【胸弟們的人品之旅】- 第叁章

Chapter 3

Woke up feeling damn grouchy, RESTRICTED SLEEPING POSTURES KILLS. 

Even though I’m often praised/ dissed by mui for my sleeping postures, I have to say that is the toned-down version she’s seeing.

Mui took way too long in the morning to wash her hair and everything WTF. Note to self to never let her go first. But it's not like we're in a rush to go anywhere - free and easy day!

Wasn’t raining today and the weather was warmer than yesterday, albeit still cool. After our long sweet free breakfast, we set off to Taipei train station as we planned to shop the underground malls.

Can't blog much about shopping but I’ll try.

I vaguely remember us standing like idiots in front of the maps found in the train station, and were planning our route. There are many shopping areas at that place, and if my memory didn’t fail me, there’s at least a K區，Y區and Z 區。

因為逛街實在是真的沒有什麽好寫的，所以就索性亂放一個美胸的錄像帶。
(pardon the quality it was supposed to be good)

臺北的地下街好像很明顯的分了高級以及親民的地方。要怎麽知道呢？看地板就知道了。。高級的地板有大理石的fu （擦亮的程度會讓穿裙的女士們擔心）

大夥兒們就亂走亂逛，瑤胸的第一件戰利品是一副他接下來都一直戴著的韓國宅男眼鏡眶。

其他人呢，就是到處找賣皮帶的店鋪。

前幾天會需要用到皮帶啦。。。在臺灣多住幾天就不用了。

整個上午我們一直在逛n家格子店 (上海之旅的最愛)，而我的目標僅是手機套（我最愛的那一條手機套碎了）及增高鞋墊 (對不住啦本小姐是矮冬瓜I need my ego boosters)

美胸就到處尋找自己 – sock。

然後考慮了半天買到了的襪子有種被坑的感覺，然後一直耿耿於懷。

雖然我也是有點略不爽那家電，因為服務員一直跟著我的屁股。。不過算了啦，出來旅行難免會被坑。

海紙阿，you should look open!

而我已經不記得連胸到底有買到些什麽了。

But lunch was at this epic Japanese restaurant and is damn delicious!!! 
Gossiped through lunch, about many things and people. 非常愉快的一餐。

愉快到我們都不想走人了，想一下午都坐在那裏聊天。

The thing I like about taiwan’s restaurants is that they seldom charge explicit service charges, you don’t have to tip, and that their service is rather good.

So what you see on the menu is basically what you fork out to pay.

Unlike damn sg, where after every meal shared with friends, you need to multiply by a 1.177, where the 7% gst is levied AFTER you pay your 10% service charges for moderate-poor services.

The place we had our lunch at has a high class feel, and is located at the classy section of the underground streets. However, the price is rather reasonable for the meal and location.

Mui and yaobra’s spaghetti, lianbra’s baked rice and my iced coffee (in an attempt to evoke a response from my bowels)       

My omu curry rice! <3 The egg is nice! ( I requested for half cooked)

You haven’t seen my face in this post yet. You are well come.

Continued adventuring through the underground streets of Taipei station.

Saw this art piece that made us halt in our steps.

歐買尬！！！傳說中的鳥人！竟然活生生水汪汪（濫用詞語）地浮現在我們面前！

作品描述與概要。

我們被這糾結的作品迷住了好一陣，像鄉巴佬一樣。。

繼續：

地下街是有蠻多服飾鞋子店，不過也真的沒興致大買特買，因為想著要扛著行李到臺中高雄，這才控制住自己的欲望了。

附贈一張地下街的圖

然後看到一個我超迷的拼圖店。賣的拼圖比我們這裏略便宜，而且我看到了我想買很久的圖。不過出國買拼圖扛回過是一件傻逼才會的事情，所以我就忍住了，沒買！
-cues for applause-

沿途走完的街，我們到從臺北接運站走到了中山接運站，然後直搭紅線，到我們的目的地：終點淡水接運站。

我想說的是。。。好他媽的冷啊！！！為什麽會穿短褲為什麽！！！不過還好我娘親的褲子是絨毛布料，不然我就可以兩腿伸直了。

所以在戶外時會戴著口罩，因為哈出來的氣是暖的，雖然略惡心了。

到達接運站後，我們直奔廁所。連路上聞到很響的鯛魚燒都沒能夠阻擋我們的尿欲。

看到一只我這輩子還沒親眼看過這麼可愛的迷你狗！可惜他媽的主人在吸煙，我們不能夠輕易靠近。#beautifulbutdeadly.

有個大叔在播放著輕快的音樂，我認得出幾句歌詞，不過聽連胸說，原創是霓虹的。

剛查了網，我熟悉的版本是曾寶儀的[專註]，是宮崎駿的[貓的報恩] 中文主題曲。

欣賞風景吧！走到了某一條看起來很好逛的街。

然後我們本來是有要去龍山寺的打算，不過走錯路+太不方便了所以我的寺廟之旅就這樣被大家遺忘了。

報酬是一堆好吃的食物。

話說我們一踏進這條街就聞到了繼光香香雞。

我和連胸一直流口水很想吃，不過我當時還是在在意卡路裏的階段，所以就沒買了。幾天後，在臺中聽我小媽媽（幹媽）說，繼光香香雞很好吃很特別，結果因為關門了又沒吃到，氣得我到現在都皮癢癢。。。我發誓我下次到臺灣一定要吃到！！！

不過也有吃到很多好吃的啦，慎重的向您介紹一下：

這間店的紅豆餅是我一時興起突然被靈體附身時，默默地說了一句  “我要吃這個” ，然後排隊買的。連胸也加入，後來大家都各自一個紅豆餅。

幸福的形狀是一粒陷料溢出來，然後只收你10元的紅豆餅。

都說了冷天吃暖食是會爽歪掉的！

看到惡心的蘑菇的我頓時傻住了。

不過瑤胸美胸在那一攤買了一桶不錯吃的。。 深海花枝燒？

然後我們一邊吃一邊走街。美胸一直在找帽子賣，後來連胸也開始了，不過十天後，也只有美胸買到了帽子。

瑶胸在寻觅银他妈的红色雷人眼罩。

看到一件有趣的店，不過我們沒進去。。因為我幾年前進過了。。

The next thing we were hunting for is mui’s 阿婆鐵蛋，which I don’t understand why people like to eat it at all. Maybe because it was bad experience but I pui the moment I placed one in my mouth the first time I tried it. IT TASTED LIKE METAL.

這種東東為什麼會有人要買。。。無法理解。。。

不過美胸還是很高興得幫別人買了很多包。

And don’t try to argue taste with me.

簡略地說，We tragic because we walked all the way to 漁人碼頭, 结果是没有走到。Because its way too far. We gave up. And there was no sunset.

Quoting from lianbra:

由于问路的老伯说直走就可以到（他的语气好像很轻松就可以走到），所以我们以为渔人码头是可以走得到的距离。可是一群傻逼走了很久很久，就快要瘫坐在路旁的椅子时也不见尽头。于是问了下路人，结果还要走20分钟才能到。我们应该做公车去的….可能前几天人品还不够好，阴天的日子没有什么夕阳可看。所以当时就果断的决定搭车去下一个行程。但上车不久天就越来越晴，夕阳也越来越明显。一点不夸张，也就在我们上车的2分钟之后。只能装作没看到了T_T。

不过途中我们还是有很开心的玩啊！
Wanted to upload photos of our talk cock and laughing but the file size too big plus you won't be interested anyway. Shall just refer to mui's video channel on youtube.

也看到了很漂亮的风景，因为这些都是试图走到愚人码头的疯子们才会有的特权！

Like how me and mui skipped down the streets.

此趟旅行就是一直不停的被judge中

We arrived at this beautiful garden like place and started our camwhoring adventures.

靠我的小幫手！很少有人經過所以絕對安全啦！

順便提一下，那裏學生的制服好特別，有“不能說的秘密”的風格。（我懷疑根本就是）。。不過想說，“人要衣裝佛要金裝”這句話不是完全可信的。
#關系人品，所以不解釋。

自拍時，我的悲劇

不知道我腦袋裝的是腦漿還是屎，傻逼的我突然跳起來，結果打到了頭頂上的假樹。更慘的是，根本沒人care，而且是時候檢查照片時才看到的。

遍體鱗傷的我們終於滾到了水邊。。。

此時太陽也開始落了

不可靠的指示牌

有一點美啦

然后我们又自拍了。。然后我们又被路人甲乙丙丁戊judge了。

飛不起來老人們(hyungs)

勇敢的，不怕死的我把相機放在小石子上才能enable這一次的自拍。
Maybe I should always report the location of my camera in all of our self-timed shots.

樂個屁啊

And we started to reach this esplanade/marina bay look alike area. We kept drawing parallels between sg and the parts of Taiwan we were at.

This photo had me laughing for a long time. Me and yao bra were lagging behind as we were spamming photographs of the place. There was this couple beside us too and the guy was helping the girl taking some artistic photograph. So me and yaobra hurried in front, so that there’s a distance between us, and she started imitating the pose of the girl while I took photos. BUT MY CAMERA COULDN’T FOCUS WAHAHAHHAA

#judged

Damn tired.

Master yao bra’s work of art. Quite funny when we viewed the photos consecutively. Angle is just right. 深情對望

And this was the point where we gave up walking to fool’s port, as we saw the 2.8km/20min more sign. (ok I exaggerated, but it’s not a walkable distance, considering our leg’s conditions too)

then we walked back to some bus stop (I HATE THEIR BUS SIGNS I SWEAR I’M GOING TO RANT ABOUT IT IN TAICHUNG) to take a bus BACK to the mrt station.

（And as I'm typing this the other three are sleeping on the mrt. We are heading to the famous shilin night market.）

士林夜市給我的感覺就是mother of all night markets.

More later.

Ok. Any trace of sleepiness was chased away when we arrived at shilin.

EYES OPEN BIG BIG!!!!

EVERYTHING ALSO WANT TO BUY AND EAT!

The shops and everything and food. I wanna live here forever.

食物和購物能夠治百病– me

But before we ate there was a little drama of how we couldn’t find the food (PANIC CAN OMG) and when we finally located it, me and yao bra waited damn long outside, while the other two went to the washroom.

We thought they got lost or something -.-

But still, I declare this “The Escalator Leading to Paradise.”

First thing we ate was the大腸包小腸 – 我吃了黑胡椒的

It was the first thing we saw when we entered Paradise.

DAMN FUCKING YUMS –NOM NOM NOM NOM-
I confess I’m swallowing my saliva while I typed this. 

Then had some 棺材板。

一片面包，四人分。Really just some.

總匯板：豬肉，蝦仁，鮪魚，香菇，玉米

吃完後要喝飲料+豐胸+催大便 = 木瓜牛奶

After delicious papaya milk, we queued for this：

脆皮超級大雞排。

I can’t even begin to describe how shuang it was, and up to this point I’m still regretting over why I didn’t have a second go.

After the very shuang dinner, we went to the streets to shop. Bought a cardigan at a very friendly and chic shop called sassy. We already contained ourselves but hyungs bought mani mani.

Shopping is fun.

又買飲料降火氣

And this place…

我懷疑我們之後的人品都是這裏攢到的。這麽貴的水果我們也買了。完全被當白癡傻子坑。不過攤主很友善啦（做生意嘛。。。）

Cry cry.

Took a cab back hotel and played bridge. I keep getting good cards. FML.

因為人品都用在這裏了。

Buys of the day:

值得記住的流行語：

YOU PAINED ME. I AM PAINING.

You are judged.

Talking to the food: YOU FATTEN ME.

Who care.

Group photo:

This photo oddly reminds me of gangnam style’s mv… what we’re lacking are leaves and rubbish and Styrofoam flying into our faces.

EXTRAS

几年前去过淡水，放在这里给你们参考吧。。。（又是阴天。。他妈）

BONUS CLIP 

Thank you if you read and commented!

;Kace